A few nights ago my mom came and sat in on my bed and comforted her teary-eyed, almost 21-year-old daughter. Yes, me. And why was I so emotional? Well, there were a whole host of issues revolving around school, summer internships, relationships and overall feelings of inadequacy. To put it simply—life. After talking and praying with my mom, however, I am so thankful that I am not in control. Yes, life’s fragility and unpredictability may be frightening at times, but I know myself well enough to understand that were I in control, I would have no use for God. In other words, if I had the strength and ability to manage all of my life, God would be forgotten in a heartbeat, for I would have no need of Him. And so, in an odd sense, I praise God that I am weak, because in the midst of my lack of control I am forced to reach out to Him. Because I do not know that my next years will bring, or even my next semester, I run to God regularly. I am thankful for all the unknowns and my lack of control—they are God’s wise and loving mercy to me, keeping me humbly at His feet where I am safest.
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